In the gaze of the other

"My mistress' eyes are nothing…"

That We Come Undone – Judith Butler

2 Comments

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“Let’s face it. We’re undone by each other. And if we’re not, we’re missing something. If this seems so clearly the case with grief, it is only because it was already the case with desire. One does not always stay intact. It may be that one wants to, or does, but it may also be that despite one’s best efforts, one is undone, in the face of the other, by the touch, by the scent, by the feel, by the prospect of the touch, by the memory of the feel. And so when we speak about my sexuality or my gender, as we do (and as we must), we mean something complicated by it. Neither of these is precisely a possession, but both are to be understood as modes of being dispossessed, ways of being for another, or, indeed, by virtue of another.”
― Judith Butler, Undoing Gender

2 thoughts on “That We Come Undone – Judith Butler

  1. Indeed. If the one you desire, or desire to possess, or desire to be possessed by, does not undo you, you are either doing it wrong, or should not be doing it there at all.

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