You’re the knife

Eavesdropping snippet of the day:

“I don’t why it is, but every time I see you I picture the blade carving into bloody flesh.”

Silence (enough said).

 

Credit:creepy pasta.wikia.com

Sex Goddesses

  
Credit: goddessofsacredsex.com
 

Urban Dictionary’s top definition of a sex goddess:

n. a female who is a deity to mankind in bed. She is so potent at giving and receiving pleasure that she will often leave men enchanted in a helplessly amazed stupor.

“I am a sex goddess,” she proclaims.

“I join the ranks of many.”

She’s right. There have been many. (See Wikipedia)

Albanian folklore 

Prende, goddess of porn

Armenian mythology 

Astghik, goddess of fertility and love

Aztec mythology 

Xochiquetzal, goddess of fertility, beauty, prostitutes, female sexual power, protection of young mothers, pregnancy, childbirth, and women’s crafts

Xochipilli, god of love, art, games, beauty, dance, flowers, maize, fertility, and song

Tlazolteotl, goddess of lust, carnality, sexual misdeeds

Ixcuiname, goddess of the carnality.

Tiacapan, goddess of sexual passion.

Teicu, goddess of sexual appetite.

Tlaco, goddess of sexual longing.

Xocotzin, goddess of sexual desire.

Buddhism 

Aizen Myō-ō or Rāgarāja, a deity who transforms worldly lust into spiritual awakening; his red-skinned appearance represents suppressed lust and passion

Canaanite mythology 

Astarte, goddess of sexual love, fertility, and warfare

Qetesh, goddess of love, beauty and sex

Celtic mythology 

Áine, Irish goddess of love, summer, wealth and sovereignty

Cliodhna Irish goddess, sometimes identified as a goddess of love and beauty[1]

Chinese mythology 

Yue-Lao, a god of love, who binds two people together with an invisible red string.

Tu Er Shen, a deity who oversees the love between homosexual men.

White Peony (Bai Mudan or Pai Mu-Tan), a goddess who tempts men, especially ascetics.

Wutong Shen, a group of five wanton deities from Southern China. They ravished and possessed beautiful women.

Pan Jinlian or P’an Chin-Lien, goddess of fornication and prostitution

Baimei Shen, Chinese god for prostitution and brothel. On her first assignment with a client, a prostitute was supposed to make sacrifice to him

Han Shn, Sage of Harmony

Shi Dei, Sage of Unity

Qian Keng (Peng Zu), God of health-focused sex.

Nuwa or (Newa), Goddess of the wedding band and wedding jewelry. Represents Heaven and the never ending sexual desire between married couples.

Chuang Mu, Chinese goddess of the bedchamber.She and his husband Chuang Gong look after everything that may happen in the bed room, including sex, sleep, childbirth, etc

King Zhou of Shang, one of worst tyrants in Chinese history. He is known as the god of sodomy

Egyptian mythology 

Bes, god of music, dance, and sexual pleasure

Hathor, goddess of the sky, love, beauty, and music

Bastet, goddess of felines, love, sexuality, protection, perfume, beauty, and dance

Min, god of sexuality, reproduction, love, and sexual pleasure

Etruscan mythology 

Albina, goddess of the dawn and protector of ill-fated lovers

Turan, goddess of love and vitality

Greek mythology 

Aphrodite, goddess of love, sexuality and beauty

The Erotes

Anteros, god of requited love

Demeter, Goddess of agriculture and fertility but also of motherly love & unconditional love.

Eros, god of love and sexual desire

Himeros, god of sexual desire

Hedylogos, god of sweet talk and flattery.

Hermaphroditus, god of hermaphrodites and of effeminate men.

Hymen, god of weddings and wedding songs

Pothos, god of sexual longing, yearning and desire

Ganymede, sometimes identified as the god of homosexual love

Narcissus, god of self-love and Vanity

Peitho, personification of persuasion and seduction

Pan, god of the wild, shepherds and flocks, nature, hunting and rustic music, and companion of the nymphs, also associated with sexuality and fertility. Famous for his sexual powers and is often depicted with an erect phallus. Diogenes of Sinope, speaking in jest, related a myth of Pan learning masturbation from his father, Hermes, and teaching the habit to shepherds. Pan’s greatest conquest was that of the moon goddess Selene. He accomplished this by wrapping himself in a sheepskin to hide his hairy black goat form, and drew her down from the sky into the forest where he seduced her.

Philotes (mythology), either Goddess of Affection or a Daimon of sexual intercourse.

Guaraní mythology 

Kurupi, god of sexuality and fertility

Hindu mythology 

Kama (left) with Rati on a temple wall of Chennakesava Temple, Belur.

Kamadeva or Madan or Kama , god of love and sexuality

Rati, goddess of passion and lust, wife of Kamadeva

Parvati, the goddess of love, devotion and fertility

Lithuanian mythology 

Milda, goddess of love and freedom

Enzo, god of love and stress

Mesopotamian mythology 

Inanna or Ishtar, goddess of sexual love, fertility, and warfare[2]

Nanaya, goddess personifying voluptuousness and sensuality

Moroccan mythology 

Qandisa, Jinn (ghost) who first seduces men then drives them insane[3]

Norse and Germanic mythology 

Freya, goddess associated with love, beauty, magic, shamanism, seiðr, sacrifice, war, death, and sexuality.

Freyr, worshipped as a phallic fertility god, he was said to “[bestow] peace and pleasure on mortals”

Frigg, goddess of marriage, married women, household duty, and divination.

Sjöfn, goddess associated with love

Roman mythology 

Venus, the Roman equivalent of the Greek goddess Aphrodite

Cupid, the Roman equivalent of the Greek god Eros

Suadela, the Roman equivalent of the Greek goddess Peitho

Slavic mythology

Dogoda, Polish spirit of the west wind, associated with love and gentleness

Dzydzilelya, Polish goddess of love and marriage and of sexuality and fertility

Lada, fakeloric goddess of harmony, merriment, youth, love and beauty

Siebog, god of love and marriage

Živa, goddess of love and fertility

Turco-Mongol

Aisyt

Voodoo 

Baron La Croix, god of the dead and sexuality

Baron Samedi, god of the dead, sex and resurrection

Erzulie Freda Dahomey, god of love, beauty, jewelry, dancing, luxury, and flowers

Yoruba mythology 

Mami Wata, a pantheon of water deities sometimes associated with love and lust

Oshun, goddess of love, intimacy, beauty, wealth and diplomacy

Yemoja, mother goddess of the oceans, fertility, prosperity, peace, and protection

Cryogenically Yours

 

 
“Wait, Walt Disney was cryogenically frozen, right?”

(We are in the car.) 

“No, I think that is just rumor, one that’s been around forever.”

“Really? Because I think he actually was frozen.”

“Look it up. You have a phone.”

“Oh look, ‘Disney on Ice’ it says, so it’s true, right? Wait, that’s a joke isn’t it? Oh shit, he was cremated.”

“Yep. Hard to freeze ashes.”

“When I go I’m going to be cremated and have someone throw my ashes in Harry Styles’ hair.”

“Um…you better put that in your will, so that your ash delivery person can justify throwing your dead-ass ashes in the man’s hair. And so he’ll feel bad enough to allow it since he will feel compelled to  honor someone’s dying wish. Bet that would go viral on Twitter.”

(high pitched laughing) “That’s a great idea! It would so work!!”

(SMH, eyes on the road ahead)

 

credit: http://www.flinthosts.co.uk

Sex Pots and Sex Bots


“The number of sexual acts and lovemaking positions commonly practised between humans will be extended, as robots teach us more than is in all of the world’s published sex manuals combined.”

Sexbots, teledildonics, cybersatisfaction…the time has come for customized cyborg sex, something I once dreamed right here on this blog in “Dream of a Mistress Sex Cyborg,” according to an article in the Guardian today entitled, “Sex, Love, and Robots: Is this the end of intimacy?” Sex toys on steroids, it seems, Realldoll team, makers of sex dolls, is on the verge of  producing sex bots, programmable to be responsive to the user’s whims, apparently, and more life like than…well, life, more accommodating, I would think.

The writer of the Guardian article, Eva Wiseman, does a bang up job of pulling in all the strands of the theme, interviewing the key parties, such as David Levy, author of Love and Sex with Robots, with whom she dances around the obvious ethical concerns about replacing the human, addiction and, of course, pedaphilia. Levy is a bit cavalier with his response about pedophiles, in particular: better acting out with a bot than on a child. He also doffs off the intimacy drain or addiction by alluding to vibrator use now. Levy is not the first to ponder the extent of the post-humanist possibilities. Biologist and academic Donna Haraway in her Cyborg Manifesto did so before him and many others, academics and popularists alike.

Just a couple of weeks ago, in a class discussion of Roe v. Wade and the future of abortion in America, I noted the Supreme Court’s critical consideration of a fetus’ viability (survival outside a womb) at some point after 3 months at which time the weighing of a state’s interests in health of the mother and potential beings against the mother’s right to privacy shifts away from the mother. I mentioned not only the medico-technological developments since that 1973 case that have pushed back viability to 3 months or earlier, but also the possibility of synthetic wombs, baby generator/gestators, like test tubes for conception, and how such a cyborg or mechanical device would change the abortion debate.

The practicality of a mechanical womb would alleviate much of the discomfort in the Roe decision, such as the inability to define a fetus as a person at law (though corporations are persons now) and the state’s intrusion into the private health care decisions a woman makes with her physician. Neat idea, which may even exist or be in the works. Then again, I’m still stoked about the remote control vibrator.

Dali’s Weirdness

dali milk

Shit Dali’s pulled like “Fountain of Milk Spreading Itself Uselessly on Three Shoes” causes me to question this surrealist’s proclaimed self-realized insanity. This one appears wacky for wacky’s sake, something like capitalizing on shock value for mere attention-getting.

So, the viewer is assaulted with not so subtle symbols: a voluptuous lactating nude on a pedestal while an emaciated man, contorted, almost seductively gazes on her while nearly disappearing into the barren landscape (but only where they strike this symbolic pose). Beyond this enclave of irony, there appears an apparent thriving village.

Of course the discordant nourishment of sprayed milk useless to the malnourished land it presumably moistens before the starving man suggests the irony of keeping “man” needs–woman, fertility, amplitude, sexuality–at a distance, out of reach, in virtuous unattainable desire, on a pedestal.

Even if the three shoes of the title presented themselves to the canvas (the missing recipients of the outpouring), that too would be as useless and incomprehensible as the spilled milk in the face of hunger. The absence of the shoes, two of them at least if that rock-looking thing is a shoe, emphasizes the disconnection and inanity. Spilled milk a’plenty to produce nothing, all for naught, and all so sterile.

Somehow the critique is not so much feminist as more generally an undifferentiated angst over the nonsense of the world resounding, I suspect. Although, I did read somewhere that the painting suggests the ongoing absence of recognized female surreal painters in the art world. Merely an ordinary art admirer with limited art or art history background, I do not really know. My shallow impression is all I offer.

What I do know is the painting gives pause, one canvas not likely to be bypassed with a quick look and assenting nod (think Chevy Chase hurriedly acknowledging the Grand Canyon in the movie Vacation) before moving on to the next frame hanging on the museum wall. For most, the intellect will be piqued before the aesthetic appreciation, like I know there’s something to this painting, some statement, only I am not sure. There could also be nothing. That’s the weirdness that is Dali.

(Thanks, Frank, for the inspiration).

 

 

 

 

Polygyny: birds do it, bees do it…

I wondered if the evolution of the mistress (and the lack of a counterpart for the male other than paramour [equally applicable to either gender], gigolo, or lover) as a socio-historic phenomenon has a genetic component. This is what I found. 
Polygyny threshold model graph

The polygyny threshold model is an explanation of polygyny, the mating of one male of a species with multiple females. The model shows how females may gain a higher level of biological fitness by mating with a male who already has a mate. The female makes this choice despite other surrounding males because the choice male’s territory, food supply, or other important characteristics are better than those of his competitors, even with two females on the territory.

Fitness (biology)

Fitness (often denoted w in population genetics models) is a central idea in evolutionary and sexual selection theories. It can be defined either with respect to a genotype or to a phenotype in a given environment. In either case, it describes individual reproductive success and is equal to the average contribution to the gene pool of the next generation that is made by an average individual of the specified genotype or phenotype. The term “Darwinian fitness” can be used to make clear the distinction with physical fitness.[1] Where fitness is affected by differences between various alleles of a given gene, the relative frequency of those alleles will change across generations by natural selection and alleles with greater positive effect on individual fitness will become more common over time; this process is known as natural selection. Fitness does not include a measure of survival or life-span; the well known phrase Survival of the fittest should be interpreted as: “Survival of the form (phenotypic or genotypic) that will leave the most copies of itself in successive generations.”
Fitness can only measure heritable differences, and these can then be chosen in mate choice, causing sexual selection. An individual’s fitness is manifested through its phenotype, which is affected by the developmental environment as well as by genes, and the fitness of a given phenotype can be different in different environments. The fitnesses of different individuals with the same genotype are therefore not necessarily equal. However, since the fitness of the genotype is an averaged quantity, it will reflect the reproductive outcomes of all individuals with that genotype in a given environment or set of environments.
Inclusive fitness differs from individual fitness by including the ability of an allele in one individual to promote the survival and/or reproduction of other individuals that share that allele, in preference to individuals with a different allele. One mechanism of inclusive fitness is kin selection.
credit: quoted from wikipedia, biological fitness, polygyny

Today I am not…

  
1. Dying of cancer

2. A refugee

3. Mourning the loss of a loved one

4. Unemployed

5. Incapacitated by illness or loss of limb

6. Alone

7. Childless

8. Parent-less

9. Abandoned

10. Living in a war-torn country

11. In danger of losing the safety of shelter

12. Hungry

13. Unloved

14. Empty

15. Sensorily impaired

16. Born to the hordes of un- and under-privileged

17. Devoid of wonder

18. Unable to experience beauty

19. Unable to create or feel

20. Under threat of destruction by weather, natural disaster, aliens, calamity or death by natural causes.

…and so, I have already won the lottery.

Pico’s Postulation

  

And I wondered if that old Italian philosopher Pico was right about humankind’s dignity and creative nature, the will of the gods, that if a man chooses to wallow with the pigs or dance with the divine, so he might do either according to how his nature blossoms from his choices. I wondered about pregnant possibilities and free will, humans as chameleons, shapers of their own destiny and fulfillers of their potential as they absorb what is around them, choosing to be like bats and hang upside down in a cave or cravenly ritualize baby killing or kiss the feet of the holy one. How free is the will of a beaten child, however, or a man gone mad from the war?

 
credit: wikipedia

 

   

    

Pissing up Ropes

  
Read a Reddit post about the plight of being white, cultureless, unoppressed and bland that someone replied to by stating, “I’m not going to waste my time pissing up ropes.” 

I had never heard of that expression prior to reading it there so researched with little success. My procrastination limits have already been reached today, so I could not spend the requisite time to do the slang expression justice, but I did find this on encyclopedia.thefreedictionary.com

“Piss Up a Rope” is a song by the band Ween in 1996 from the album 12 Golden Country Greats. It was released on 7″ yellow vinyl single on Diesel Only Records.

When asked about the lyrics “You can wash my balls with a warm wet rag” and “On your knees, you big bootied bitch,” Dean Ween stated that he wrote the song for his wife. The inspiration for the title came from his father: “[It is] a funny expression that I copped from my dad. When I was a kid, he used to say, ‘Aw, go piss up a rope.’ It was just nonsense. It was like, ‘Aw, go shit in your hat’ or whatever.”[1]

I gather it is a British expression for some futile exercise, but I would love to find the origins of the expression, just because…well, being a logophile, I like that sort of thing. Who first thought of it and in what context?

Oh, and there is a Facebook page with the title “Pissing up Ropes” that has one like.

Anyone know something about this expression?